Lest we think that Wesley’s Aldersgate experience took away any future doubts and fears on his part, check out this snippet from his Journal dated October 14, 1738, nearly five months after Aldersgate.
I cannot find in myself the love of God, or of Christ. I have not that joy in the Holy Ghost; no settled, lasting joy. Nor have I such a peace as excludes the possibility either of fear or doubt. When holy men have told me I had no faith I have often doubted whether I had or not.
Contrast this entry from yesterday’s entry about Aldersgate. This is one of the reasons I love Wesley. He was quite honest about his faith journey and here he reminds us that he too has to struggle with his fallen nature and body of sin. Reading this reminds me in good company when I am in the midst of my own struggles. How about you?